After Xmas Thoughts

Even though I was out of town for the holidays I was able to carry on with my favorite holiday tradition of driving around trying to find stores that are open on xmas day.
My nephew's six year old daughter burnt me, in front of everyone, for not saying grace before our xmas buffet, and this was after I gave her an Easy Bake Oven.
I lusted after my brother-in-law's 58 inch HD projection TV.
I ate everything that wasn't tied down, and lived to tell about it.
I am the family electronic's genius, meaning that I am the one that finally checks to see if it is plugged in after all else fails.
Six inches of snow on xmas morning.
How did people live before high speed internet access? Why did people live before high speed internet access?