I have blog paranoia. (blog-anoia?)
All blogs are better than mine.
Fellow bloggers read, pity, scoff at, and dismiss my efforts.
No one actually reads my blog, they stumble in, realize where they are, and head to the nearest porn link to cleanse themselves.
I am funny, amn't I? This isn't the Round Table at the Algonquin, but it's not kiddie porn either.
Speaking of the Algonquin, Dorthy Parker was a real slut, but she was funny. My favorite Parker quote concerned Katherine Hepburn's acting ability. Opined Ms. Parker, "Katherine Hepburn runs the gamut of emotions from A to B."
But back to my blog-anoia ...
You are secretly jealous of me and masturbate while reading my blog, and no I am not masturbating while I am typing this, well not anymore.
I've been sick lately, I can't help it. I've been using that excuse all my life. It usually works.
Dammit, I was at Woodstock, and served in the 'Nam, at the same time, show me at least as much respect as you show Aretha Franklin.
I need a haircut, big deal, I'll get one tomorrow.
Skeet, bleat, and double skeet.