Things I hate about Thanksgiving
1. The parades.
2. That chemical in turkey that makes you sleepy.
3. Thanksgiving Day marathons on various cable channels. I mean 48 seconds of Paige Davis already seems like 48 hours, so why bother.
4. Looking for a store that's open at 10 PM because you ran out of toilet paper, or Cheez Whiz, or condoms, or toothpicks, or Depends.
5. Is it just me, or is it always really cold on Thanksgiving?
6. It's A Wonderful Life. Look Zu-Zu another friggin' angel got their friggin' wings
7. Old guys and their multi-colored plaid pants pulled up to their armpits.
8. Turkey farts.
9. Purple food.
10. The voices in my head kicking the decibel level up a couple of notches to kick off the holiday season.